What do you see when you look out the window? The world. What do you see when you look inside? Yourself. You see your clothes hanging loosely by the shelf, your books like a haphazard puzzle with Oscar Wilde, and Sparks touching odd ends. Then, you look a little closer, and you find tempted to find yourself in this maze. This maze that belongs to you, for you to uncover, for you to play with, for you to keep, and to lose.
The 'let go' moments are the hardest, when you are keeping things for a dismal day, to fondly look back and smile, you make a small mental note that in itself is a puzzle in the mind. Like a piece jutting out of your senses, the assorted memory breaks down into coinciding dates and time and weathers of your life gone, the impulsive moment hanging like an expensive scarf, or a broken heart peeping through a book.
What do you see when you look in the mirror? I see ghosts of the past, staring, leaving. I see transcendence and an odd pimple dotting that creased line, and you realise childhood is over. Vanity, is one of the traits we acquire like a territorial right on the body to remain as it is. I fail to see the youth sometimes, the mind's functioning so adept at spotting the unaesthetic parts of life that it is so difficult to remain where you are even while your body stays immobile. Then I see my life, how it is, and I move away.
I want to know what it is that drives us, what is it that keeps us, what is that breaks us and how we function in everyday lives as individuals trying to get that elusive piece of yourself. That, I find the most odd. The elusive piece of the self, petered out in the world in the form of humans, relations, brief heartbreaks, loves, and losses.
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